Dealing with painful emotions, without a doubt can be excruciating, hence why we try our best to dismiss, ignore and numb them. We would rather try to shove it aside than work through them, doing so however does not help or benefit our well-being.
Below are 5 steps to apply and help you through your process of healing:
Find a healthy support system: do not isolate yourself or try to go through this journey by yourself, speak to someone be it a friend, counselor, spiritual leader, family member or a psychologist. Having someone to speak to is good as speaking about how you are feeling often helps with healing. You will not be seen as weak or less if you reach out for help, no man is an island and for that reason we need people, whether we want to acknowledge it or not.
Do not blame yourself or others for where you find yourself: pointing fingers does not help you heal from what you have been through, instead it holds you captive and will leave you waiting for apologies or explanations that may never come. You may or may not have been able to prevent what you have been through but it happened and all you can really do now is accept what has taken place and move forward from there. Do not allow guilt or blame to keep you from healing.
Don't avoid your emotions, sit with it: Allow yourself to feel different emotions, as it is important to be aware of how you are feeling and not to dismiss or hide from them. It will allow you to express how you are feeling and will assist when speaking to someone as they will be aware of where you are at and it will help you to feel better. As releasing our emotions so often do.
Be selective with the company you keep: when going through the process of healing you may find that you are extremely sensitive, simple things may set you back and tick you off. For this reason it is important to surround yourself with people who will understand where you are at and that you are fragile, as much as it is your responsibility to ensure that you get better. It is also the next persons responsibility to be accountable for how they treat others and what they say, unfortunately very few people are able to do this and for that reason it is imperative that you surround yourself with people who will not make you feel worse, but instead will uplift you and help you in becoming better.
Abstain from negative beliefs or thoughts: We so often get stuck in the "life is unfair" and "I don't deserve this" phases that we lose sight of our healing and become stagnant. We may even believe that so much damage has been caused, it is impossible to heal. This however is not true, as long as we are willing and ready to be healed and feel better, our healing can begin but until we are at the place where we are ready to start the process, nothing and no mere man can heal us. It something we need to do for ourselves, with the help of God and those who love us.
Do not delay your healing by holding onto who or what hurt you, go through it, give it to God and work on becoming better and remember that your thoughts and actions play a huge role in your healing. You are what you feed yourself, so deconstruct misconceptions and the lies and redefine yourself.
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